Celebrating the Uterus: The Portal to the Spirit World

How recognizing the seasons of your body can improve wellbeing

I’m guessing it won’t surprise many of you that many women have complex relationships with their bodies. For many women, motherhood may complicate matters further. Our culture suggests that the goal after motherhood is to return to who you were prior to giving birth (physically and productivity-wise) as soon as possible after, so the additional softness and body fat that many mothers’ bodies hold can feel like a failure. However, motherhood can and should also help us realize how magical our bodies are. 

The uterus is literally a portal from the spirit world to this world, with our bodies transforming food and parts of ourselves into another living being. I remember the moment that I realized my body had made a person body AND soul. I believe I was reading Tami Lynn Kent’s book, Mothering from Your Center, I had always felt amazement about creating a new body, but I was totally floored when I realized that my body had either created or brought forth a soul for that body as well. 

Ancient cave drawings in Lascaux Cave. To me, caves have a womb-like energy. Photo by Bayes Ahmed

I really feel like this capability is underrecognized and undercelebrated. After thinking deeper about this topic, I realized that part of celebrating the uterus as a portal and the female body more generally is celebrating menstruation. The menstrual cycle is essentially building an altar to life every month, then taking it down and starting anew. 

At this point, some men or women who don’t menstruate may be tempted to tune out. I’d encourage you not to, though, because it can help you relate to the women in your life mentally, emotionally, and sexually (if that is the nature of your relationship). It can also help you recognize cycles in your own life and how dreaming, creation, discernment, and rest cycles could serve you in your own life. 

I, like many of you, have a complicated relationship with menstruation. My first period was when I was 10. It was mildly embarrassing—conspicuous bleeding at my piano teacher’s house. However, my second period was a sort of teen comedy movie level of humiliation. I bled during gym class…in white gym shorts…that I had borrowed from someone else…who was much cooler than me.

The message I received, or at least the message I internalized was, “Here are some pads. Your period will be an embarrassing pain in the ass for the next 40 years. Good luck!” There really was no upside, aside from having children. At the age of 10, that didn’t really seem like much of an upside. 

Only about 25 to 28 years later did I learn the powerful, and in fact, useful gifts of the menstrual cycle. If we can coordinate our working or creative lives with our menstrual cycle, we can schedule brainstorming during the follicular phase, the big push to finish a project during ovulation, or editing and reorganizing during the luteal phase. This allows us to work smarter and not harder, and accomplish a lot without feeling like we are “forcing it” or expending more energy than we have. Living within the patterns of the menstrual cycle allows us to keep our lives in balance by listening to our bodies, which echo the cycles of the moon, the seasons, and even our lives. 

Those who do not menstruate may find it useful to incorporate these cycles by following the cycles of the moon. Let’s start understanding the cycle in the follicular phase, right after bleeding stops. 

1. Follicular phase, roughly day 6-11 (Waxing moon, Spring, Maiden)

This phase takes place from the end of bleeding until just before ovulation. Estrogen rises in preparation for ovulation. During the follicular phase many people feel more energetic, hopeful, and ready to dream up big ideas. In fact, recent research has identified that specific structural changes occur in womens’ brains throughout the menstrual cycle. It appears that surges in luteinizing hormone and estrogen coincide with faster information transfer in the brain during this phase. Imagine the energy you feel in your body and mind as you soak up the warmth of the spring sun, the buzz of bees at the crab apple blossoms, and the sweet smell of lilac blooms in spring. This is the energy you can bring to your life during this phase. 

2. Ovulation, roughly day 12-17 (Full moon, Summer, Mother)

During ovulation, estrogen levels peak, which increases energy and libido and improves mood. Even your skin will be glowing and clearer. It’s time to bring those big ideas from the follicular phase to fruition. It’s also a great time to schedule date nights in light of that increase in libido. Of course, this is also the time pregnancy is most likely to occur. Imagine that time in summer when you look around and it appears that everything is in bloom, the birds are singing, and you’re just immersed all of the life bursting forth around you. This is a time when you are most connected to your creative powers. 

3. Luteal phase, roughly day 18-28 (Waning moon, Autumn, Matriarch)

Progesterone rises initially in this phase to support pregnancy. Based on the recent brain structure research mentioned above, rising progesterone levels increase grey matter thickness in some areas, but decrease thickness in other areas. We do not yet know how these cyclical changes impact behavior and cognition. Estrogen levels drop. If fertilization doesn’t occur, both estrogen and progesterone decrease at the end of this phase. Many women will feel angry or sad. It’s a time when the inner critic will assess what is—and what’s not—working in terms of your projects, relationships, and life. This can come across as bitchy, particularly if you are used to being pleasing in other phases. Many people resent or resist this time, but it provides useful guidance about where change is needed or needs aren’t being met. If you feel angry about the same thing every month, it’s time to examine where an adjustment can be made. 

4. Menstruation, roughly day 1-5 (New moon, Winter, Crone)

Progesterone and estrogen are at their lowest levels. As a result, energy levels decrease simultaneously. Carving out time to rest during menstruation often decreases the symptoms women experience during PMS and menstruation substantially. In many cultures, menstruation is known as a very spiritually powerful time; a time when a woman is more open to the spirit world. In fact, in some cultures, the dreams of menstruating women are used to guide decisions in their villages and communities. As noted above, we don’t yet know how the cyclical structural changes of the brain impact behavior and thinking. I wonder if these structural changes could also lead to increased spiritual openness if we rest and quiet ourselves enough to listen. 

How Can You Claim the Benefits of the Menstrual Cycle for Yourself? 

If I’ve succeeded in persuading you that the uterus is amazing as a portal and a guide for balanced cyclical living, then you may be wondering how to start honoring your menstrual cycle (or your daughter’s) in daily life. 

Eat cyclically to nurture and nourish yourself.

1. Follicular phase: Beans, eggs, meat, oily fish, fermented foods, sprouted foods are helpful because they help metabolize excess estrogen. 

2. Ovulation: Fresh fruits and vegetables, legumes, nuts, seeds, and fresh herbs aid in stabilizing estrogen levels, which results in fewer PMS symptoms during the luteal phase. 

3. Luteal phase: Whole grains support production of serotonin (the neurotransmitter we are trying to increase when we take anti-depressants). They also help satisfy an increased appetite during this phase. Vitamin B6, which is found in avocado, bananas, beef, chicken, garlic, salmon, spinach, sweet potatoes, and tuna, can help increase production of progesterone, reduce inflammation, and clear out excess estrogen, which reduces PMS symptoms. Foods rich in magnesium and calcium, such as apricots, beans, brown rice, cacao, cheddar cheese, kelp, leafy greens, molasses, nuts, seaweed, sesame seeds, and tofu, reduce fluid retention, constipation, headaches, and also increase progesterone levels. 

4. Menstruation: Eat foods rich in magnesium, zinc, antioxidants, iron, complex carbohydrates, and fats. These help with production of progesterone and estrogen, support the immune system, breakdown prostaglandins (which increase the pain of cramping), reduce symptoms of cramps, headaches, and breakouts, and reduce fatigue and mood swings. 

You can even eat foods that feel more summery during ovulation or more wintery during menstruation. For example, when you’re feeling energetic during ovulation, a fresh smoothie may be quick when you’re feeling action-oriented. This provides fresh fruits and vegetables to help metabolize estrogen. While in menstruation, you may want to use roasting or stewing, which are low-maintenance cooking techniques that allow you to rest and feel grounded and nurtured.

Make Space For Rest. You, yes you, need to rest during your menstrual cycle. Perhaps all that feels doable at the beginning is to carve out an hour for yourself on the first or second day of your bleed? Or even 30 minutes. That’s okay. Make a cup of herbal tea and sit outside by yourself, soak in a bath, or enjoy whatever simple pleasures make you feel cared for. Admittedly, I find carving out that hour as a working mom can be moderately challenging, although now that my kids are in school, I’m working toward building up to a full school day per cycle. Even more challenging than carving out the time is actually being still and quiet and resting during that special time.  I find it challenging to rest for rest’s sake. I often write not to clear my mind, but to produce something to share or publish. I’ll even take a bath, with the intention of processing grief or fear rather than just savoring a warm, relaxing environment. When the goal is to make a bath “productive” it might be time to strengthen one’s relationship to rest. 

How about you? What do you do or ask others to do for you during your menstrual cycle so you can savor it as a time of sacred rest? Have you seen benefits in your life because of this? 

How Can You Help Your Daughters Claim the Benefits of the Menstrual Cycle? 

A girl’s first period is an important rite of passage in her life. Paying attention to her gifts, interests, and dreams around that time may help her to understand the gifts she has to offer the world as she grows into adulthood. Familiarizing girls with bleeding before they reach the time of their first period can reduce shame and counteract the negative messages about menstruation they are likely to receive from others. 

• Create a small ritual to share with your daughters on the first day of your bleed. It’s great to include them before they start menstruating themselves. I hope to riff on this beautiful, simple ritual with my own daughters starting next month. 

• Create a moon basket that can be given to a girl at her first period, or perhaps slightly before. It includes gifts that encourage self-care, slowing down, and self expression. It might include a journal, a calendar, affirmation cards, jewelry with a red stone, a womb-warming pillow, a cycle-tracking bracelet, a red candle, a pink quartz or moonstone, art supplies, books, or herbal recipes. 

• Celebrate your daughter in community. To do this well, it’s necessary to know your daughter and your community well. It may be embarrassing to be the center of attention because of menstruation. Perhaps you celebrate womanhood and your daughter’s gifts separately in community, and simply take your daughter out for a “grown-up” dinner to celebrate her in the moment? Maybe you co-create something that feels meaningful to you both? Or possibly you have some other special adults that can celebrate with her one-on-one to make her feel really special. If your daughter is self-conscious, as one of mine is, she may prefer not to have any attention on her. I’m planning to brainstorm ways that take that into account, while still emphasizing the significance of the milestone.

Celebrating the gifts of the uterus—to rest and create, to nourish, nurture, and hold—are vital to our own wellbeing. This practice is also beneficial to help us view ourselves as more than what we produce. It can also change how we live in balance in our lives and within the world. 

The discernment and rest that come with PMS and menstruation (if we listen) can help us identify our true needs; the ones that are unique to us and the ones that we need to address even if other people don’t share those needs. Listening to our needs and our soul calling through this structured, routine, and cyclical rest can help us expand into our full selves and spiral out to every cycle of our lives. 

I would love to hear about your relationship to the menstrual cycle or the rest/create cycles in your lives!